Editor's Note: It's here! The moment has finally arrived. Today is the day we announce the winner of our 1st Annual Steve's Word Beer Bracket. Or is it? You've been intensely following the regional playoffs for several weeks here, here, here, and here. Our Final Four format did not play out as originally intended due everyone's zany Summer schedules, so we had each of our bracketeers remove all bias from their previous picks, put all four beers into a ring, and see who came out on top. Each Bracketeer found his or her own special way to determine the winner. We think you'll enjoy it. Let's get started.
I look at the final four and I see a beer for everyone; The sophisticated, four-eyed Three Philosophers; a chillaxing, good looking Hoegaarden; the slutty and unpredictable Victory Hop Devil; and the drunken hick uncle, Dale’s Pale Ale. I would love to see these interacting at a summer BBQ, I’m sure there would be no conversation that could possibly interest everyone. It would be a party with lots of uncomfortable silences to start, then followed by all out debauchery, the way most uncomfortable parties seem to end up. After a fierce battle using fold up chairs, broken bottles and some truly confusing riddles (thanks Three Philosophers), Victory Hop Devil takes it down. During this fierce competition I tried to find the perfect beer for a hot, summer, 4th of July weekend, and though beer-pong dominated my activities this week, the beer I would drink on the side would be Victory Hop Devil, distracting me from the mosquitoes that were dead in my solo cups.
Welcome to Week 4 of the 1st Annual Steve's Word Beer Bracket. As my grandmother always says, it's on like Donkey Kong in a rather revealing thong. In this week's article we find out who will be the last competitor in our maddening Final Four. Have a gander at how the bracket shapes up now here. If you enjoy reading, laughing, and learning, take a look-see at how we arrived at the results for Week 1, Week 2, and Week 3. This week's winner was determined by yet another newbie to Steve's Word. In our efforts to stay hip to what all the youths are up to, we've employed the services of youngster Chase Booker. This recent college grad somehow found time between writing term papers, twittering, and playing Xbox 360 to write a studious and entertaining breakdown of his bracket. Let's get to it!
1 Chimay Première vs 16 Foster's
Foster's is really crappy. I only ever buy it by accident when I am on my way to a party and, at the bodega, am faced with the holy trinity of Bud Light-Miller Lite-Coors Light and iconoclastically decide to buy something that tastes virtually the same as all three of them but has a different label. Chimay, as we all know, is a wonderful beer -- many people's first introduction to Belgian trappist-style ales, and truly one of the best. As you can imagine, Chimay proceeds, because I hate Foster's and I don't know why I ever find myself buying it because it's absolutely horrible. Problem is, Foster’s is only the first of the many bad lagers I had the honor of tasting for my bracket. Thanks, Mitchell.
What are the two greatest things in the world? Yep. Beer and tournaments. I can assure you that it is not poetry and science. We love drinking beer and crossing names off brackets more than anything else and you do too. So, riding on the coattails of our much successful March Madness tournament pool, we dreamed up a fanciful sequel to the old leather pumpkin single elimination competition on a rare and beautiful afternoon when nearly all Steve's Word contributors and groupies were in the same room. After several hours filled with laughs, brainstorming, and having to poop in public restrooms the inspired idea was born. The field of 64 was carefully chosen by our esteemed beer committee; Avery "Tex" Booker, Mitchell "Kevin Arnold" Frye, Elle "The Girl" Scoots, and Chase "The Kid" Booker. In order to make the tournament more closely reflect the proceedings of the NCAA Basketball tournament, the seeding, like all important decisions, was determined by someone horribly underqualified. That annointed ignoramus was Tim Spellman. Click here to see the bracket. For the next four Wednesdays we're going to be giving you each region's winner as determined by our experts. When all is said and done, there will be a massive party with only the Final Four Beers to drink. Our judges and the party attendees will decide the champion of the 1st Annual Steve's Word Beer Bracket through a series of rows, fisticuffs, and make-up sex. Without further ado, let's have Avery get things started.
What about the previous work week were you most looking forward to getting away from?
Tucking in my shirt.
What were you most looking forward to this weekend?
It's winterish and all, so my weekend demands are pretty simple nowadays. A couple extra hours of sleep, the joy of not-shaving, and maybe a movie or something.
Come on, Eldrick.