nate green

Jobs We’re Gay For

soccer_cap.jpgWelcome to another installment in our "gay for" series.  We've covered the men we love (twice) and the response from the other side, as well as giving some love to select politicos who made us swoon during the height of last summer's election insanity.  In this edition, we bring you some professions, real or imagined, that fill our dreams with the wondrous flights of fancy of what our lives might be like had they taken a completely different path.  Please to enjoy the jobs we're gay for.

Tim - Soccer Historian/Sociologist

How rad would my life be if I it consisted of hanging out on the campus of some elite university, studying the developing history of soccer in the United States, teaching undergrads, and having Summers off to go watch football all over the globe? We are in the midst of an accelerated cultural revolution when it comes to the World's game and I've got my finger on the pulse. I'm so horny for this job that I've even read the only book written on the topic, Offside: Soccer and American Exceptionalism, I subscribe to several soccer-related twitter feeds, and I actually enjoy playing the game. This makes me probably the biggest soccer nerd you've ever met. The other weekend, I went to go see Chelsea vs AC Milan in Baltimore. Other than the game, my favorite part of the trip was seeing tons of little boys in Chelsea and AC Milan jerseys. This got me quite fired up and not for the reason you're thinking. With the slow but steady legitimization of MLS, an expanded and more thorough US Soccer development strategy, and European leagues regularly on television, today's youth is into soccer. That's what excites me. The more young people who are genuine fans of the game ensures the growth of the game and quality of play here in the United States. Those cute little buggers in those darling little jerseys were merely signifiers of this.

You Want Me to Do What to Your What?

david-carradine-1.jpgYes, that's right, I'm back.  I'm in full-on confessional column mode because I know the world is dying for another glimpse into the bedroom and brain of little old Nate Green.  And you're in for a special treat today because I've got something special.  Get ready for a wild tale full of intrigue and self-deprecation, sexual adventure and general emasculation.  What else would you expect from me?  I know, right.  I've really got my niche nailed down.  At least that's one thing I'm nailing.

I'm where you might picture me: sitting at my desk in the wee hours of the day.  I haven't been able to sleep for the past couple of nights and instead of milling around my apartment for a few hours and killing time by watching SportsCenter over and over in the morning, I've been coming in to the office and sitting in the dark, like I do.  You see, it all started the other night during that crazy-ass lightening storm that occurred at three in the goddamn morning.  I snapped awake to the sound of a crack of thunder and suddenly the whole room was lit up like the stage at the Super Bowl Halftime show.  I could see my freaking shadow and everything.  That storm was the exclamation point on the craziest night of my whole damn life, a night I've yet to really process and certainly nowhere near recovering from.  You see, when that thunder woke me up, I wasn't in my bedroom.  And I wasn't alone.

Resolutions (You Keep to Yourself)

timessquare.gifWelcome to 2009.  We all make promises at the start of a new year, some that we speak openly about and some that we keep to ourselves.  This is a collection of the latter, because you deserve to know the truth.  Be prepared for a little darkness, some heart-wrenching tales of self-improvement, and another journey to the depths of Nate's soul in this column that we can proudly say all of Steve's Word's contributors managed to pull together to collectively write (except for one).  Please to enjoy our resolutions.

Ped Sex-Ing

ped_xing.gifIt's six in the morning and I'm sitting here at my desk at the front of the Steve's Word office.  This is becoming quite my column modus operandi, I think that's the phrase.  At least I'm not hungover this time and I'm not shaken to my very core.  I'm feeling quite the contrary, to tell the truth, because I got laid last night.  I know, I know.  I didn't think it would happen to me again either, especially after my very explicit previous column.  I guess it's a good thing not everyone reads Steve's Word.  Wait, that can't be right.

Oh man, I feel fantastic; I'm sure you've felt like this once or twice in your life.  And, not to brag or anything, but I thought I might share with you some lessons and revelations that I picked up last night.  Don't worry, it's safe for work.  Unless you don't work at home.  Just kidding.

Web Design by okbreathe • © Copyright 2009 - Steves Word, All Rights Reserved
Syndicate content