Lifestyle

The Day that is the Day

booth.jpgAfter nearly two years of campaigning that has included tons of debates, stump speeches, robo-calls, blackberry invention and air quotes, we're finally here.  Today is the day, the day that all the hand wringing, breath holding, drunken arguing has really been about.  It's been so central to our consciousness, so present on our iCals, it's almost mind-boggling that we're actually

The Hangover: Who Are These People?

parentsWho are these people? Did you just here that? You actually believe that? These are questions that I've been asking lately about a certain type of McCain/Palin supporter. I have heard similar questions and sentiments espoused by many a friend and colleague too. No, I'm not talking about the racist, uneducated, prejudiced, reactionaries like this.

Hott Lixx: Fishing For Revenge

Jitney DriverWell, Ranch Hands, my time as a guest blogger here at Steve's Word is nearing its end. But before I limp down East Colfax into the sweet, honey-gold Denver sunset, this week I'd like to share an excerpt from one of my novels, to show y'all that there's more to this ol' dog than boozin', courting loose women, and incorrigible lead guitar antics. And I'd like to remind everyone that copies of all of my novels are available at my mobile home in Arvada. Just go ahead and knock. I'm usually around.

So without further ado, here's the climactic seventh chapter of my 1988 three-part novel, PESCADITO! One Boy's Journey on a Colombian Fishing Jitney. Hope you like it.

Hott Lixx: I got scammmed (sic)

Veljay2So there I was, a typical Friday night, few months back, sitting on the good corner of my futon in my birthday suit, surfin' the wonder that is the Internet, virtually cruisin' for trim. I go to my favorite website, http://www.denvermuff.com, and see a banner ad that says, "Guess who played Carl Winslow on 'Family Matters' and get a free box of deodorant!" Well, for the love of Pete, I was quite the avid 'Family Matters' watcher, and as any devotee of TGIF knows, Carl Winslow was played by none other than the perpetually underrated and classically-trained actor Reginald VelJohnson.

So that got me thinking.

The Hangover: Gutted

wild thingI don't have a ton to say because this weekend I tried to tune out the media as much as I could. I did, however, watch Colin Powell's endorsement of Barack Obama. I admired the endorsement because of how clearly and eloquently he made the case for voting for Obama over McCain. Probably the best I've yet heard, but does anyone really care about these endorsements? Does it really persuade anyone? My gut says, No. My gut tells me that it's just a way for people to feel important. You know what? Maybe I'll hold a press conference in my bedroom about how I'm endorsing Obama. How's that sound? I've been feeling a little low and a press conference just might be the remedy.

Hott Lixx: Went on a Date

JonieeyLife is strange. It's like a seesaw of emotion, with glee on one side and sorrow the other, and sexual intercourse acting as the fulcrum.

I gotta be honest: things have been better. I guess you could say I've hit a bit of a rough patch. I've had a few late night rendezvous-es, but in the long run, you can't consider a quick-n-dry T.J. in the bushes at Cheesman Park "the real deal." O, and as the years fall through our fingers like fine, fine sand, I feel my mortality creepin' up to me, slowly, but with the potential force of ten souped-up GTOs. My biological clock is bangin' around in my belly like a construction worker trying to jackhammer the pavement with one hand while he struggles to put the other hand in his mouth to whistle at a beautiful woman.

Command D: Revenge of Command D (Or how I learned to stop hating George Lucas and accept his influence in my life)

stormtrooper pin-up

You knew it was coming.  This Command D's theme is inevitable like the changing of the seasons, the rise and fall of the ocean, or the way all of my internet searches eventually lead me to porn.  Of course we're not just talking about a force of nature, we're talking about the force (Luke).  Yes, if ever there was a culture more ingrained in the internets than the ones we talked about last time, it may only be in the Star Wars culture.  I suppose you could argue that the two aren't mutually exclusive too.

Hott Lixx: Out of Touch?

Barkeep

Hott Lixx: Infinitesimal Passion

craftmaticPassion is a multi-layered cake. Setbacks for raisins, Love for flour, and sweet, sweet sexual tension for frosting. Although I'm getting older and it's harder for me to sit up in bed so I bought an adjustable bed from the TV, the reason I get up in the morning is passion. Passion for the Ranch, passion for my sweet Epiphone Les Paul, passion for booze 'n the finer things in life.

The Hangover: Chased Away

wamuFor me, the weekend started on Friday. As you may or may not be aware, I freelance, so a lot of the time it's hard to tell where one week begins and another ends. Sometimes this is a good thing, but a lot of the time it's as if you were staring into a deep abyss. An abyss with no clearly defined short-term goals or life plans. There is only what's behind you. One of the things that was behind me was my bank, Washington Mutual.

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