Monday Hangover - 7.27.09

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andy_cohen.jpg• What were you most looking forward to this weekend?

Spending time with people under the age of 3.

• Any updates to your Netflix queue?

No, I've been stalled out trying all weekend to get through a very boring french film about reality television, so boring in fact I can only watch in 20 minute increments.  There are two upsides to the whole experience, however: I learned that François Berléand, who plays the Inspector role in the Transporter movies, has incredible range and also there's a shot of Diane Kruger's saggy ass which made me feel better about things.

• How's that major life decision going?

Getting closer everyday!

• Which story from the current news cycle is bugging you?

Michelle Obama's new pin up hair style is not news.  It's just not, she just threw a couple of bobby pins in there.  I mean, if she really got a drastic hair cut, I could understand why CNN would be all atwitter about it.  But not for bobby pins.  Really.

• What was the single most annoying thing you had to deal with this weekend?

The heat.  Wait, the rain.  No, wait, the lightening.

• What was the biggest disappointment of the weekend?

No sex.

• Review a TV Episode, Movie, Book, Article, Restaurant (or Meal), or Sporting event in one sentence?

Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen, on Bravo, is genius.  Seriously, not only is it my new favorite show, but it totally makes up for all the time and brain cells that I wasted watching the Real Housewives and Kathy Griffin.  Ok, here's the skinny on it: Andy Cohen is a Bravo executive who has developed (I guess) a bit of a following from hosting the reunion shows for all the Bravo shows.  On his show, which is set in a make-shift library, Andy has a guest, talks to some other people via Skype and takes questions via his twitter page.  Also, he drinks the whole time and is so fabulously gay.  He gives out a Mazel of the Week to someone doing something fantastic and a Jackhole of the Week to some jackass.  I can't tell you how unexpectedly great this show is.  Andy Cohen, you get my Mazel of the Week.

• Did you leave your town?

No, but I did spend half the week in the Hamptons which was really nice.

• What's the funniest thing you heard or saw this weekend?

My niece asking me if my 1970's Cassina chaise lounge was made of "doggie."  Also, she kept referring to "her" house in the Hamptons.  Also the sound of Eli (our good friends' newborn) passing gas, while holding him by his bottom.

• What's the unfunniest thing you witnessed this weekend?

While having a double date night at a highfalutin place on Saturday night, our waitress stumbled and knocked my friend's beer glass onto the floor.  This in itself is not that big a deal, glasses break, but for some reason the waitress decided to put a large chunk of that glass back onto the table, not realizing that the base was partially broken, and when it tipped over bits of shattered glass flew everywhere.  Tiny shards were all over all of our place settings, in all of our glasses, scattered over the remnants of the appetizers we were almost through with.  In an attempt to smooth things over, the place decided to comp us another round of our appetizers, which were delicious, but no one wanted to eat their entree after double dipping on the starters.  What a mess it all was.  Then, that same waitress forgot to include our booze on the bill and for some reason that I still cannot understnad, my boyfriend and my other friend decided to correct her mistake, according to them "it was only fair."  What turds.

• Did you do anything this weekend you've never done before? If, "yes", summarize in one sentence.

Watched an outdoor performance of Hamlet with my 3 year old niece in 90 degrees of heat and humidity because she liked the girl dressed as a princess.  Good thing we left before that girl's boyfriend called her a whore and she threw herself into a river to drown.

• "Just throwing that out there." Go ahead, just throw something out there. Anything. Anything at all.

The Mets need to get their shit together.

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