Killing Time in the Summer, Toder-style

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dosequis_interesting.jpgThis may or may not turn into a continuing feature, it depends how it turns out and how much material it actually creates.  In other words, this could be the start of something great, or it could crash and burn and I'll look like a jackass.  Hey that's cool, I'm totally used to it.  Anyway, the other day I found myself having to kill a few hours in the city.  This seems to happen to me a fair bit, especially during the summer.  Obviously, I need to learn how to schedule appointments better.  On the other hand, now you get a glimpse into some of the things that casually passed through my head as I wandered around.

If the New York Public Library system wants to thrive they only have to do one small thing: make all their locations look like Barnes and Noble's.  Seriously.  When I went wandering through both the original location on 5th avenue and the gigantic four story one in Union Square, I must have stepped over at least three hundred people all told.  People just sitting around and reading, on every available chair, step ladder and window sill.  Many had parked themselves on the floor throughout the whole "fiction and literature" section.  I was flabbergasted.  First, it was a little shocking to see all those people just sitting and reading, and I mean that in a really good way.  It's great.  But then again, this is a store, not a library.  I don't think Barnes and Noble intended for people to come into their establishment, sample their merchandise for hours on end and then waltz out without making a purchase.  We've turned Barnes and Noble's, and other bookstores I imagine, into libraries and people were loving it.  Why can't the NYPL system take a cue from this and start thriving?  I don't exactly know why the world would be a better place if the NYPL did in fact thrive, but I know my life would be better without the annoyance of walking over people on the way to find a new novel.

It was fifteen years ago yesterday that OJ Simpson made the white Ford Bronco the chic choice for double murderers everywhere.  What a wild ride it's been since then; on a personal note, that divides my life into two nearly perfect halves - pre-OJ and post-OJ.  It's really amazing how far the world of sports media has come since then.  Obviously the internet has a lot to do with that, and sports certainly uses all of the internet's various facets to their peaks.  I wonder what would have happened had the internet been around for that, it might possibly have exploded.

Speaking of sports media, if you didn't catch (and for some reason haven't heard about) Artie Lange's performance on the pilot of Joe Buck Live then you need to.  Really, it was amazing.  On the other hand, this sort of incident, while making Buck look like the jackass that we all know he is, ensures that there is buzz enough to warrant another episode.  So that's a drawback.

I went to see Waiting for Godot on Broadway the other night.  There might be a column about it next week.  Also, John Goodman is too huge for words.  I don't mean this in a callous way, I'm really just concerned.  There's a portion of the second act when he flails on the ground for a bit, bleating like a mortally wounded goat and it was legitimately and genuinely distrubing.  Also, his feet are like flippers.  I swear twice the size of the other actors on stage.

I really like the Dos Equis ad campaign about the most interesting man in the world.  My personal favorite line is, "his reputation is expanding faster than the universe."  I don't know, it just has a great ring to it.

Stay thirsty, my friends.


  • 1

    A journey into a portrait of madness and hilarious observation. Well done, Toder.

  • 2

    You're hurting me. But seriously, I only got fat for the part. I am usually only about 160 lbs soaking wet. Ah, such is the life of a Broadway Actor. Thanks for your concern, Matt. Kudos!
    PS - Check out my reel. I've linked to it on my name.

  • 3

    [...] night, through some happenstance and coincidence and no small amount of frustration, I spent a portion of my evening at a reading and signing at the Barnes and Noble’s in Union [...]

  • 4

    Short? Concise? Not too trite? Who the hell ARE you?

  • 5

    so glad you're back, ed.

  • 6

    Ed's back! Christmas came early this year!

  • 7


    officially i stand by the steve's word party line that it's great to see you again after all this time. where you been, buddy?

    however, my personal response is three-pronged:

    1) i never claimed that my column would be short or concise, in fact it's clearly a ramblings column, so your expectation is absurd. you are a crappy reader as well as a jerk.

    2) actually, this column is short (650 words) compared to the multiple 3,000 word columns that i've written. obviously, you need to catch yourself up on my oeuvre.

    3) two weeks ago, i received an email from the real ed weems who asked that i make sure that people coming to our site don't confuse him with you, apparently he doesn't think too highly of what you have to say either. so i guess the real question is: who the hell are YOU?

  • 8

    You moron! You insist on feeding the troll. Stevesworld is a jackass.

  • 9

    moron? jackass? that's all you got? you're the worst troll ever. didn't even have the decency to respond to any of my points. that's just sad, ed. really sad. with these piddling little responses, why wouldn't i keep feeding you? you amuse me.

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