Trendspotting: Facts R So Lame-O

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love_liesThis election cycle has revealed many trends. Apparently, as Hilary Clinton and Cindy McCain have shown us, you can spend $3,000 on a pantsuit. I guess Anne Taylor Loft simply doesn't cut it any more. Sorry, ATL. Back to the mall with you. Another fabulous trend is that Main Street is the hottest place to be. Not to mention being "guilty by association." What's out: "palling around with terrorists." I guess I won't be getting a falafel for lunch today. What's in: talkin' folksy.  What's out: the "g" at the end of words ending in "g".  You see, enunciation and eloquence are hallmarks of elitism and the general liberal Wall St. culture that got us into this mess in the first place. But this year's biggest trend has to be that facts are out. Relying on truthful information and knowledge? See ya! Facts have gone the way of poodle skirts and dial-up internet. No, you're not taking crazy pills, facts don't matter any more. Let's take a look at how this trend got so hot by focusing our style lens on the Republican Candidates, their ads, and the supporters who ascribe to whatever the tastemakers put out there. Let's start with the candidates. We could probably write an entire book filled with examples of Johnny Boy McCain and The Moose Lady avoiding the truth, but since they've shown us just how out books are, we wont be that passé.  Since we're such fashionistas over here at Steve's Word, and books are filled with ugly facts, we'll stick with the Internet where disinformation rules supreme.  The best, nay sexiest, example is clearly the recent Troopergate findings and the McCain/Palin response, which has been nothing short of Orwellian.  Who knew that a guy dead sixty years could be so hot right now?  In case you missed it, the bi-partisan committee found unanimously that Govsie Palin had abused her power by carrying out a personal vendetta on the People's time.  Although it was ruled that she was legally allowed to fire her Attorney General, she was ethically corrupt in pressuring him to fire her ex-brother in law Mike Wooten. Not to mention letting her husband rule as her proxy. However, upon reading the report, the Governor and First Dude said "eww, facts" and asserted that they had been cleared of all wrongdoing.  They stared those ugly, out of fashion condemning facts right in the face and said, "get out of my face facts. Your yesterday's news," and their supporters stood up and cheered their defiance. You go, girl! We can't give Palin all the credit for this Lie-fest that's sweeping the nation. What Johnny Boy has discovered is that the lame-omore you tell a lie the cooler it gets. Contrary to previous trends, there's no such thing as overdoing it when it comes to lying. The chic-est example of this is how McCain, in his Maverick way, will not give up on the lie that Obama will raise taxes on everyone. If you're a rational person, you'd think that this distortion was disproven in the first debate, and you'd be right. It was, but that doesn't matter. It hasn't stopped John “I’ve-Crashed-Three-Or-Four-Airplanes-So-I-Think-I-Know-A-Thing-Or-Two-About-Wasting-Tax-Payer-Dollars” McCain from restating the lie in the two subsequent debates and all of his stump speeches. OMG, now that is one cool dude. But let's not stop with the words that have actually come out of their mouths. McCain/Palin are so committed to making sure that this new trend becomes all the rage that they saturate their ads with the day's hippest lies. In this ad, McCain and Palin accuse Obama of being the most liberal senator.  This in itself is lie. Head to the lamest sight on the internet to get the truth if you want to be such a nimrod. However, McCain and Palin truly strut their stuff when they assert that Obama is "Not Presidential" because he can't get down with lying. Apparently all Black people aren't cool because Barack is def anti-lying. Hey Grandpa Barack, why don't you take your Truth and this bag of Werther's Originals and go back to your Peanuckle game at the Old Folks' home?  We'll hang out here with the cool kids on Main Street spinning the most elaborate yarns you've ever heard. Speaking of Main Street, which these days is cooler than the runway at Bryant Park during Fashion Week, McCain supporters have fully caught on to throwing facts to the wind and shrieking lies like a bunch of boy crazy school girls. Some the hippest lingo at McCain/Palin rallies, better known as the Cool Kids' Club Meetings, are such innacuracies and dangerous lies like "Obama is a terrorist," "Obama wasn't born in the United States," "He's funded by Hamas and the PLO," "He's a Muslim and thus a Terrorist,". Take a look at what these folks were saying in Ohio. Or these other folks in Ohio.  A trend is nothing unless it's embraced by the common man, Joe Six Pack as it were, otherwise it's just elitism and we know that's sooooooo out.  ;)


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    I luv m' fiance! I cain't wait to be married! I'm so excited!


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    [...] The best, nay sexiest, example is clearly the recent Troopergate findings and the McCain/ Palin response, which has been nothing short of Orwellian. Who knew that a guy dead sixty years could be so hot right now? In case you missed it, …[Continue Reading] [...]

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    "Hey Grandpa Barack, why don’t you take your Truth and this bag of Werther’s Originals and go back to your Peanuckle game at the Old Folks’ home?"


    This shit is tighter than the Governor's Tina Fey glasses. I also appreciate the "I've-crashed-three-or-four-airplanes-so..." middle name thing we've got going here on this site.

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