Dear Buenos, Long time reader, first time writer here. I was inspired to write after reading a recent column where you gave great advice to Portly in Portland and his/her struggles with a new job. I too just got a new job and am having a struggle. You see, I love my new job. I had been unemployed for a while and then landed a near-dream job and I'm really psyched about it, I love coming to work every day and I'm really motivated to do a good job. There's only one problem: all my co-workers hate working here. They complain all the time, they slack off, they promise to do things but play video games all afternoon instead. I don't know what to do. I don't want to get angry with them because I know that won't make them do anything, but I'm not sure how much longer I can carry the entire load. Plus, it makes me feel like I've made a terrible mistake even though I still love this place. Please help. - Confused in Cleveland
You know, CIC, having never done a day of work in my entire cat life, I have a difficult time relating with your dilemma. I think perhaps the best advice the Buenos can give is to use his favorite adage "if you can't beat them, then you should devour their lunches." Every day when they are not working, go to the lunch bowls first and eat all of their lunches. That way they will realize that they need to pay more attention to what is going on around them instead of their video games. This is how I retaliate when Trixie beats me up. I just go in the morning and eat all of her food before she gets up. Then she is too weak for the rest of the day to beat me up again. The other way I have heard that adage is "if you can't beat them, join them." I think that is less of my favorite adage because it has little to do with food, but it also could work in your case because if you refuse to do all the work yourself, then the others will have to help or let the work be late. The question then becomes, who will get in trouble for the work being late? Maybe your co-workers know that you will get in trouble because you are new. If that is the case then I think eating all their lunches is the best solution. Good luck, CIC!
Do you want to learn how to get double lunches at work? Email the buenos: firstname.lastname@example.org
Come on, Eldrick.